#anyway listen to poc voices to stop being so fucking annoying

[sprimpfriedrice]

White dungeon meshi fans sound like this to me:

It's extremely fascinating and frightening to me how hateful some of you people are towards shuro, a man who is clearly depicted as japanese, (a man who could look like me or literally any member of my family in real life) for being a normal, complex, and flawed human being.

Why do you single him out for getting frustrated with and mad at laios when chilchuck and marcille do the same literally all the time? What's the difference between them and shuro?

Why do you feel the unnecessary need to protect these white women from a japanese man?

Do you expect that this japanese man is inherently going to have some kind of ugly negative quality that has not been once hinted at canonically? Do you know what that's called? Because i do and it's fucking racism.

You people get scared the moment a character that is a person of color isnt a quiet little model minority or a sweet mammy archetype. You grasp at your pearls the moment they are revealed to have complex personalities and histories; when they feel negative, big emotions that are literally part of the human experience. Or god forbid, when they show romantic interest in a pure, helpless, little white woman.

And when a person of color stops behaving good and docile the way you want, when they decide that theyre not going to put up with a situation that makes them uncomfortable or miserable or RIGHTEOUSLY FURIOUS, they become the bad guy. As seen countless times in the medias demonizing depiction of the Black Lives Matter protests and even of black people who get punished for just living their lives. It happens so often i shouldnt have to reiterate it to you but it somehow keeps flying over your head.

And when that dirty, conniving, perverted, slant eyed, buck toothed, stumpy little japanese man understandably snaps at the white person you guys are projecting onto and all you see is this:

So dont be surprised when i say that id rather kill myself than entrust the safety of my oldest aunts and uncles or my youngest cousins with any of you who act like this. Im terrified of what could have happened if people like you worked at the facility that my great grandmother lived out her final years in. Would you have seen her as a wild animal that needed to be subdued too when she had one of her many dementia-induced violent episode?

I will not apologize for saying that i find it deeply disconcerting to see so many of you happily posting hateful vitriol or even about committing acts of violence against a man that looks like me, solely because he was experiencing his humanity

[amxranthiine]

e t h e r e a l (ron weasley x poc!reader)

ethereal (adj.) extremely delicate light, not of this world Pronouns: She/her

Request: Hiiiii! Can I request a Ron weasley x sweet smart reader (if you do POC can she be black?) and she’s a slytherin and friends with a lot of people and has a huge crush on Ron and she’s pretty sarcastic when she needs to be and hermoine is jealous of her because Ron really likes reader and she’s really pretty and smart and Ron plans on confessing to her but hermoine confronts reader trying to tell her she’s not good enough for Ron but reader is headstrong and doesn’t care cuz she loves ron to much and Hermoine and Ron get into an argument about it with her telling him she loves him but he doesn’t feel the same way and asks reader out later she says yes and hermoine is heartbroken(I’m sorry that’s so long I get pretty detailed��)

A/n: Ahhhh! My first request!! Thank you so much for requesting this darling! Set in third year, the reader is a Slytherin. I’m so sorry if this isn’t what you wanted, I struggled with her being sweet. I had to make it a little angsty, sorry about that! 2.3k words of solid chaos, please enjoy!

Warnings: Bullying? Light swearing? Angst, then a bit of *fluff*, one f-bomb.

Summary: The reader is a POC Slytherin, who is in love with her friend, Ron Weasley. After an awful day, and a run in with his obsessed best friend, can she win the love she desires? (I’m so bad at summaries I’m sorry)

⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙ Y/n’s POV “What on Earth are you looking at, L/n?” A voice says to my left. A voice that belonged to Draco Malfoy. I snap out of my lovesick gaze and clear my throat, trying desperately not to blush. I had been staring at my longtime crush and friend, Ron Weasley, for the past five minutes. I thought I was being subtle, not that that matters anyway. Ron barely acknowledges my presence and Malfoy notices everything.  I would have been more scared if it were Granger who had caught me. Merlin knows she hates me for no reason at all, other than the fact that, you know, my robes are green instead of red. Oh, and she knows I like Ron. Bloody brilliant. Her catching my heart eyes would send me flying straight off the Astronomy Tower. She would be the one pushing me. It’s not that Hermione is a bad person, per say. It’s just, she’s a little... Possessive when it comes to her friends. Ron, specifically. She hates Slytherins with a passion solely because of Malfoy and his bag of rats, which is understandable. I just don’t understand why we’re hated for being cunning and ambitious, not all of us are dabbling in the dark arts! Malfoy pinched my dark skin, “I asked you a question, blood traitor.” Of course, because I’m friend with Muggleborns and Half-bloods, that automatically makes a traitor. Almost as bad as actually being a Muggleborn. Recoiling slightly, I lie. “I wasn’t looking at anything, Malfoy. I was merely thinking about the Potions essay that’s due on Wednesday.” On the outside, I may have looked annoyed, which I kind of was. But on the inside, I was trembling like a terrified doe. Merlin, why couldn’t he mind his own business? Playing with a strand of my dark hair, I sighed in exasperation. Malfoy snorts from beside me, “That’s a lie and you know it. Everyone knows you could rival that Mudblood Granger with how smart you are.” He spits out Hermione’s name as if it’s poison. I blush at the compliment (at least, I think it was a compliment) and look down and my hands. My green nail-polish contrasted nicely against my chocolate skin and Slytherin robes.  Inhaling sharply, I take a leap of faith and glance over at the Gryffindor table, only to find the man of the hour already looking in my direction with anger and hurt written all over his face. He then looked to my left, where the blonde ferret was sitting, and his hurt turned to fury. If looks could kill, Malfoy would be cremated in a second, just from the look Ron was giving him. My heart jumped to my throat, and I could feel my pulse everywhere. Why is he giving him that look? Why is he angry with me? What did I do?  Draco noticed my attention was no longer fully on him, and followed my eyes to the redhead. A look of realization crosses his face, and suddenly, he’s cackling. “Him? L/n, are you mentally deficient? He’s a Weasley! A blood traitor! He’s friends with Potter!” His words have a sense of venom to them, even if he’s laughing. I glared at him with cold eyes, “Listen, love, I have no reason to dislike Potter, unlike you. I also have no reason to dislike Ron, in fact I quite enjoy his presence. So, if you would please drop the matter and go on with your life, I would be thankful.” Malfoy’s face morphed into one of anger and disbelief. Sure, we may be friends, but I don’t deal with his crap just because he’s rich and a Malfoy. Luckily, or unluckily, Pansy Parkinson saved me from his wrath. “Yeah, okay Y/n, you’ve been in love with him since first year, everyone can see it!” She snorts, and the entire Slytherin table erupts into giggles. “That is, everyone but the Weasel,” She adds on. My face is as red as Ron’s hair and I feel my eyes tear up. Was it true? Did everyone know? I look around the room for a second, only to see Hermione glaring at me with a raised brow. I look away quickly. Malfoy is practically wheezing from how hard he’s laughing, “Honestly, Y/n, do you really think you have a chance with him? He and Granger practically eloped the day we got here! You would be crazy to think you actually stood-” He stops talking when I stand up, tears streaming down my face. “You can burn in hell, all of you.” I whisper, my voice breaking. Everyone suddenly has a look of guilt on their faces, and I look at Ron one last time. I can tell he’s concerned, but I don’t need him. “Wait, Y/n, it was just a joke!” “Merlin, she’s so dramatic.” “Y/n, where are you going? We were just kidding!” I hear yells and shouts from the Slytherin table as I sprint out of the Great Hall. But what really got to me, was the one thing I heard from the dreaded Gryffindor table. “Look at her, pathetic isn’t she? She can’t even take a joke! Ronald wher-” Bloody Granger. Bloody Malfoy. I turn the corner and slump against the wall, sliding onto the ground with my legs straight out in front of me. I struggle to breathe, the sobs are coming out too harshly. I was a liked person in my year, with plenty of friends. At this moment, though, it seemed as if everyone hated me. I tried to muffle the sound of my cries with my hand, but to no avail.  “Y/n! Are you alright?” I eyes dash to the sound of the familiar voice, and quickly wipe my eyes when I see Ron running towards me. “Y-Yeah...” I mutter, “I’m fine.” My lungs hurt from holding back my cries, my lips quivering from the familiar sting in my throat. Ron sat down beside me, my eyes meeting everything but his own. “You’ve always been a bad liar,” he chuckles slightly. I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks. “Have not,” I mumble. As much as I craved his presence, I was not in the mood for games. I looked down at my hands, something that was quickly becoming a nervous habit. Luckily he must have sensed that I didn’t want to talk about what just happened, and stayed silent for what seemed like eternity. Ron examined me for a moment, he was nervous, just like me. I didn’t know what he had to be nervous about, it wasn’t like he liked me as anything more than a friend... “Y/n...” He whispered, I hummed in acknowledgment, looking at him. “I-I just want to say,” He stuttered, “I don’t care that you’re a Slytherin. I know that may seem impossible because I’m a Weasley, and a Gryffindor, but...” He trailed off and took a deep breath, “ I-I care about you...” My head shot up so fast, I’m surprised I didn’t get whiplash. My heart was thumping against my ribcage harder than ever, and my stomach felt weak. “R-Ron?” I whispered, not wanting to believe my ears or what my brain was trying to desperately to tell me. He likes you, you idiot! Why can’t you see it?  He bit his lip and closed his eyes, something I would have found absolutely adorable if I wasn’t about to faint. “Y/n, I-” “Ronald!” Yelled a high pitched voice. My heart (and spirits) dropped and I sighed. Here we go. “Where have you been? We’re going to be late!” Hermione yelled. “Coming, ‘Mione,” Ron called after her. He looked at me apologetically, though he also looked... pained? “Ronald! Stop talking to the snake and hurry up!” She shouted again, and my rage levels increased drastically with those few words. Ron squeezed my hand to try and calm me, or to stop me from pulling out his best friend’s hair. “Bloody hell, woman! I’m coming!” He turned to me, “Bye, Y/n, see you later.” With a small wave, he was off. It was later that night, I was walking back to the dungeons after hours in the library, writing my Potions essay. Humming a tune I don’t remember the name off, I was slightly spaced out as I strolled along the familiar corridors. What wasn’t familiar, though, was the wand at my neck. Hermione-fucking-Granger was standing right in front of me in all her brilliant glory. Her perfect defensive stance with her wand right in my face. “Hello, Hermione,” I say, trying to stay calm. She scoffs, a disgusted look painted on her face. “Don’t ‘hello, Hermione,’ me L/n,” She practically spits. I shrug, and try to move around her. “Okay, then goodnight, Granger.”  She still blocks my path. “What’s going on with you and Ron?” There is an edge to her voice that tells me there are no right answers. I am genuinely confused and befuddled, “Nothing is going on between Ron and I?” I state, though it sounds more like a question. What on Earth made her think that someone was going on between Ron and I? I mean... I wouldn’t complain if something was going on, but alas; absolutely nothing. I suppose that answer only made her angrier; “That’s bullshit.” “Is it?” I question, trying to push her buttons. She scoffs again and pushes her wand closer to my face, “Ron is mine. Not yours, mine. Stay away from him, or you’ll regret it.” I was raging at this point, but I couldn’t say anything... harsh to her, because Merlin forbid anything happen to the Brightest Witch of our year. So, instead of potentially harming my crushes obsessed best friend, I settled with, “Yeah, okay, whatever Hermione. Can I leave now?” Seemingly satisfied with my answer, she steps aside and watches as I walk away. “I’ll be watching you, L/n,” She says, trying to threaten me. I just snort. “I’m counting on it, Granger,” I call back and pranced away. Internally I was screaming, what would she do to me? Why is she so obsessed with him? Is she so jealous that she feels the need to threaten any girl that even comes close to her precious Ronald? Yes, she is.  The next few days, I avoided Ron like the plague. He knew I was avoiding him, too. Anytime he was within fifteen feet of me, I turned around and practically ran the opposite direction. It didn’t help that Granger had such a smug smirk on her face whenever I saw her. All I wanted to do was shove my middle finger in her face and call it a wand.  It was getting increasingly difficult to ignore Ron, and I didn’t know how much longer I could keep up with it. The longing stares when no one was watching, to the daydreams of what we could be during class- I couldn’t stay away. One night, I was- once again- walking back to the Slytherin common after hours in the library. Only, it wasn’t a wand in my face that made me pause. No, it was the distinct sound of arguing around the corner. Curious, I tip-toed towards the noise, trying to be as quiet as possible. Which was hard because of the echoing halls of Hogwarts, but somehow I wasn’t caught. “Why would you do that, Hermione?!” A very familiar voice yelled. “Because, Ronald, she’s a Slytherin!” Hermione yelled back. “That cannot be the only reason! She’s the nicest Slytherin there is! You don’t own me, ‘Mione! You have no right to decide things like that!” Ron was fuming, I could tell just by the sound of his voice. Somehow, I knew they were talking about me. I was the only Slytherin Ron could tolerate. “Fine, you want to know the reason? I love you, Ron! She was getting in the way!” Merlin, I really should stop listening before I start crying. “Getting in the way of what?!” “Us!” “There is no ‘us,’ Hermione! I don’t love you, I love Y/n! And you deliberately sought her out... And threatened her?! Bloody hell, you’re completely mental!” Ron was practically screaming at this point, he was so mad. I was completely shocked, he loved me? He loved me?! Am I dreaming? Apparently my gasp was louder than I thought, because both Ron and Hermione turned in my direction. Well, shit, I can’t run now. “You love me...?” I whisper. My mind couldn’t wrap itself around that fact. My tummy was swarmed with butterflies, my feet tingled and my hands were completely numb. I couldn’t believe it. Ron just stared at me, mouth opening and closing like a fish. “I-... I... Urm... Y-eah.. I do,” I could have laughed at his attempt to speak, but I was completely dumbfounded. Not trusting my voice, I raced over to him. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled him into a kiss. This kiss... it was something ethereal. It was slow and passionate, but full of love and desire. There was nothing else like it. Our mouths moved in sync for what seemed like forever. I didn’t want it to end. His hands traveled from my waist to my face, cupping my cheeks gently as he towered over me. Alas; all good things must come to an end. Unfortunately we have lungs that feel the need to burn when you don’t breathe. Pulling apart slowly, I smile at him, genuinely smile. His cheeks are almost as red as his robes, and his hair ruffled from my hands running through it. “I take it you love me too?” He asks, smiling just as wide as I am. I nod, and giggles flow out of my mouth from how happy I am. He looks like he’s in a daze, “Bloody hell, Y/n, you’re brilliant.”  “Y/n L/n, will you be my girlfriend?” He doesn’t leave my embrace as he asks this. I gasp, “Yes! Merlin, yes!” Jumping into his arms at lightning speed. A quiet cry is heard from the right of us, and we look over to see Hermione, a hand over her mouth and tear stains on her cheeks. Ron shrugs, “Sorry, ‘Mione!”

[xxmiizcornerxx]

Darker the Berry (POC! Reader x Aizawa)

A/N: Okay so heres the late story I’ve promised! Sorry for the delay, my internet has been booty buttcheek and my only source of comfort has been Mario Kart 8 deluxe and my Soundcloud listening history 😣 ANYWHO~ This story is on the issues(insecurities) of colorisim. And this is for my insecure baes out there that just needs some love🥰So enjoy! (And hopefully my internet doesnt give out once im done (┬┬﹏┬┬).....)

A/N: Oh! Another side note, this is in Aizawa’s POV for the most part!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘Oh for fucks sake. This is just embarrassing.’ 

Thought Aizawa Shota, aka Eraserhead, a somewhat well known hero. At least till another well known pro hero comes around. Anyways, it was late at night and Aizawa was at a small restaurant waiting for his date to come. But by the looks of it, he probably just got stood up. Recently he has been trying to “get back out there” to not only have his comrades off his back but also because he was becoming lonely. He wanted that emotional support from someone other than his students, family and friends. Someone he could come home to every night to ramble about absolutely nothing or about everything going on in his world. And sure he had his best friend and his cat to talk to, but its not the same. He wanted that somewhat perfect love he sees everywhere he turns. 

 With a tired sighed, he was getting ready to leave but all of a sudden he could hear an all too annoying familiar voice. Even without his quirk, Hizashi Yamada is the loudest man on God’s given green earth. “HEY SHOTA!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” He asked loudly making the people in the restaurant jump but Aizawa was accustomed to it.

“OOH! ARE YOU HAVING A DAT-?!” Aizawa instantly covered his mouth annoyed, “How about you shut up? Anyways yeah but I was just getting ready to-” he was cut off when a 5′8 dark skinned woman with the most beautiful set of dark eyes that was barely covered by the few dreadlocks that poked out of her high bun. She was dressed in light shades of grey and white that made her skin pop out. She was truly what they called a goddess among men. “I am so sorry I’m late! I got so busy with work, I lost track of the time and decided to come straight here.” the woman rambled not fully realizing that Aizawa was too busy silently thanking whatever deity that was here for not only sending Hizashi for stopping him from walking out that door but also blessing him with the most gorgeous person he’s ever seen. 

“It’s alright. My colleague here just stopped me from leaving.” He stated in his usual monotoned voice removing his hand from his friend’s mouth and sending him a look that said ‘ If you say or do something to ruin this for me, I will personally rip your vocal cords out.’, thankfully Hizashi got the memo nodding in slight fear. “Indeed I have! And now that you’re here miss, I can get what I’ve came here for and leave. Have a goodnight you two!” he stated as quietly as he can possibly get and left. “Sorry about my loud, somewhat obnoxious colleague. Here let me get your coat.” Aizawa said gently taking the woman’s coat setting it on the back of her chair. “Oh its alright, I have also been ‘plagued’ of having a very, very loud best friend. But you learn to get used to it.” she joked a bit taking her seat which only left the hero himself to take a seat. “I see. Well I don’t think we’ve properly introduced ourselves. I am Aizawa Shota, an absolute pleasure to meet you.” He said with a tiny little smile. “It’s wonderful to meet you, Aizawa. I am Y/N L/N.” she returned the smile flashing her pearly whites a bit. And with that led the beginning of a great date. The night was filled with a few laughs, a few stories about their past as children and teenage years.

Soon the two were at a park, the air was brisk and cold. The moon, stars, and streetlights illuminating their path and a small light drizzle of snow softly falling from up above. It was like a seen from a Hallmark Christmas movie, just absolutely perfect. Aizawa and Y/N were getting along great and were sitting on a bench somewhat snuggled up against one another but not quite because personal space still exists. Currently the topic of conversation landed on insecurities. Aizawa admitted to Y/N about how he felt about his own unkept look and how it took a lot of faith for him to even go out tonight. “That’s reasonable.” said Y/N, “But just in my own opinion, that unkept look is your own. Not many people can pull it off and still look as handsome.” she chuckled giving him a soft nudge of her elbow to the barely blushing man. “Well what about you? What are your insecurities?” Aizawa was genuinely curious about what she could possibly be insecure about. She was practically perfect in all aspects; has a good sense of humor, an amazing sense of style, very well educated, has more confidence than anyone he knows, and to top it all off, just carries herself respectably.

Y/N bit her thumb a bit nervous, for what she was about to reveal is going to be silly or at least that's what she thought. “Well. The thing I am most insecure about is my....complexion. As you can clearly tell I am not in anyway light skinned or even milk chocolate. And I know it is silly to be insecure about but from where I come from looking like me is a target in more aspects than one. To some being dark skinned has even been turned into a personality trait.” Without even noticing, Y/N ended on an entire rant about how her skin was and still is a target for ‘dark as night’ jokes or the ‘loud mouth, ratchet, Hot Cheetos’ girl. How people within her own community would just assume that she (and many others) fought or was angry all the time or lived in a really bad area where there was a lot of sun. Or the worst of things, that if she was a slave back then she’d be in the cotton fields. Every time she was told that or something similar, Y/N’s self-esteem would just crumble entirely. It made her feel unwanted, unloved, unnoticed, and just down right ugly. By the end of her little rant, she found herself trying hard not to cry in front of Aizawa. She didn’t really intend to just lay it all out there on the table for him, but maybe it was for the best. If they were going to continue dating then it was best for her to lay out all of the cards on the table and show him what he’s getting into.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make everything so gloomy with my little insecurity reveal.” she said giving an awkward smile to the now stunned man. He personally didn’t understand how anyone could be cruel to their own people, let alone for how they looked. It was foolish and childish to say the least. But he was more than proud of Y/N for being able to overcome it all. “Well I’ll be honest here. I won’t pretend that I have any form of resemblance of what you must’ve gone through over the years simply because of your skin color, but I will tell you now. Your skin is beautiful and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I am willing to learn about the struggles you face and if fate allows it I’d love to be by your side as I do.” He said in a serious tone, gazing into her eyes and gently taking one of her hands bringing it to her lips planting a soft kiss upon her knuckles. “All those people in the past or in the now that has anything to say about your skin in a negative light are simple minded nincompoops' that have yet to be enlightened. After all, don’t they know?” he asked tucking a dread behind her pierced ear. “Know what exactly?” she asked with the most brightest smile that night. “Don’t they know that the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice?” That alone made Y/N laugh but Aizawa was being serious. “Boy, don’t do that. Plus how would you know?” she asked as her accent came out a little. “Well I don’t. But why don’t we find out?~” he asked teasingly leaning into her ear.

Needless to say.....

Best. 

First Date.

 Ever.

[bxmbiiii]

I Missed You (M)

(A/N: This smut request was also supposed to be up last night a long fucking time ago after the Mark au request. Once again, I’m sorry I got delayed😭 Anyways thanks for the love lovelys💕 btw I’m sorry it’s really long)

Warnings: Smut, daddy!kink, poc!reader(black), pain!kink, oral (female and male receiving), overstimulation!kink, dirty talk, squirting

“YASS GIRL! They really did!”, you laid on your stomache on your bed, in pajamas, talking to your best friend. You had receipts and she had tea, so ain’t nothing wrong with exchanging information, until it got to the topic of your relationship. More specifically, you and your boyfriend, Chan’s, sex life.

“Girl, you been way too out of it these days. When that boy said he’s gonna be back?”, asked all to knowingly smacking her gum. “In two more weeks, but don’t worry about it, I’m fine. Oh and stop smacking, that shit is annoying!”, you scolded her. A knock sounded at the door, saving you from her growing fit on the phone. “Somebody at the door girl, I’ll call you later.”, you hung up and walked downstairs.

“Channie said he was coming back in two weeks, and it’s late, so who the fuck is at the door at this hour?”, you swung the door open in annoyance. Looking up, we were met with a handsome face, your boyfriends handsome face. Chan smiled down at you as you stood still at the door, shook. “Nice to see you too baby.”, as soon as you heard his voice, you jumped into his arms.

“OH MY GOD! You said you’d be home in two weeks!”, he looked up at you as he carried you inside and closed the door. “I wanted to surprise you, but it looks like I’ve got a surprise too.” His accent deepening, as well as his voice, as he bit his lip. You arched an eyebrow staring at him, “What do you mean? I’m literally in pajamas right now.”, gesturing to the tank top and silk shorts you were wearing. “Baby, I think you forgot that this is the same thing you wore the night we fucked before I left for tour.”, he smirked.

You looked down at your black tank top and purple ,tight-fitting, silk-satin shorts. You slowly looked back at him, his eyes now clouded with lust. Not going to lie, you liked it. In turn you bit your plump bottom lip and smirked, “You gotta problem with that, Daddy?” Chan’s eyebrows raised as a smile crept upon his face. Saying nothing, he kicked his shoes off, with you still in his arms, and slowly made his way upstairs. Getting to the door way of the bedroom, he put you down.

“I want you,” Chan started, wrapping his arms around your waste. He lowered his head next to your right ear and whispered, “Naked, face down, ass up and the black paddle in your hand.”, he lowered his arms, large hands coming to grip your ass tightly, “Got it?” You looked up at him and licked your lips, “Yes, Daddy.”, he smiled with false innocence, “Good girl, you’ve got fifteen seconds.”

Quickly, you ran into the room and threw of your tank, thanking God that you weren’t wearing a bra. You quickly slid off your shorts and panties together, when Chan called out, “Five seconds baby!”, with the quickness you grabbed the paddle from your play drawer and hopped on the bed. Chan opened the door as you got into your arched position, pussy wet and on display for him. “Fuck, babe. How’re you already wet and I haven’t even touched you?”

Having taken off his shirt outside of the door, he walked towards you while unbuckling his belt, and sliding off his jeans. You strained to listen for any movements from him, indicating he was still there as it had gone quiet. Just then, a large hand landed harshly on your left cheeck, making it jiggle. You yelped, startled, “Sorry baby, but you know how I get when I see you like this,” Chan slipped the paddle from your hand and rubbed soothingly over your ass, “I missed you, baby.” He slid the paddle down, rubbing it over your clit lightly, earning a soft moan from you. “Did you miss Daddy too?,” he asked, suddenly adding pressure.

It caught you off guard, your mind clouding over already. As you took a second too long to answer, a hard strike was landed on your right cheek this time, making you moan a little louder this time. “You know Daddy doesn’t like it when you stay quiet baby, use your words.” Landing another smack to your already bruising ass, Chan spoke again, his voice now dropped an octave lower, “Did you miss Daddy ba-” “Yes, Dadd-,” another smack resonated through the air, as you bit your lip, eyes tearing from pain and pleasure.

You had interrupted him, to eager for something, anything, to happen. Now you knew for sure you were going to be punished. “You seem to have forgotten who’s in charge baby,” another hit applied to your left cheek now sounded, “Guess I’ve gotta fix it, huh?” Chan rubbed his hands lovingly on your cheeks, massaging the sores. Kissing you left cheek he spoke, “Count aloud and if you mess up, we start over, got it?” You smiled to yourself, “Yes Daddy.”

Like the speed of sound, the paddle landed harshly on your left cheek, “One!”, you yelped, lower body jumping. Chan watched as the action caused vibrations throughout you. Eagerly, he raised his hand, and sent another shock, this time to your right cheek, “Two!”. The pain was pleasurably addicting, causing your pussy to become more wet than normal. “Three!”, your ass was now becoming taut. You weren’t the only one becoming hornier by the second, as Chan’s erection gets tighter to the sounds your making.

He feels precum leak from his tip inside his boxers, as he delivers the fourth hit, “F-four!” You felt your arousal, slowly, drip down the inside of your thighs, slicking them. Catching sight of it, impatiently, Chan delivers the last strike hard. Weakly moaning, your mind was already clouded over. You felt Chan’s body weight shift behind you, but before you could turn your head, you felt a warm, wet, tongue lick a bold stripe over your lower lips. “S-shit, Daddy!”, you felt him smirk as he gave your clit quick kitten licks.

Chan’s hands came up to grip your thighs firmly, keeping them apart, as he began sucking on your clit. Moaning loudly, you began grinding your hips into his face. You could feel him smirking against you as he wrapped his lips around the nub, and began sucking on your clit hard. All of a sudden he removed his mouth, replacing his tongue with two long fingers. You bit into your pillow to keep from screaming, as he set a fast pace, hitting your spot repeatedly. Chan used his tongue along with his fingers, slowly kitten licking your clit, while hitting your g-spot.

As you felt a coil in your stomache tighten and begin to snap, Chan curled his fingers, hitting you deeper than before. “Ahh...fuck. Daddy don’t stop, I’m close.” You felt your eyes tear up, as Chan began slurping your pussy. Obscene sounds whirling through the air, it was enough for you to hit your climax. Moaning into your pillow loudly, your walls tighten around his fingers, soaking them and his face. “You taste so good baby.”, Chan said still thrust his fingers in and out of you slowly, riding out your orgasm. He slowly removed them, earning a low whine from you, and put them up to your mouth.

“Suck,” Chan commanded. Obeying you opened your mouth and wrapped your lips around his fingers, licking and slurping them clean of your juices. Chan removed them from your mouth slowly, and brought his hands to your waist, flipping you onto your back. “Get on your knees for Daddy, princess.”, you quickly got up and dropped to your knees, face to face with his enclosed length. Chan pulled down his underwear, thick, hard length being released and slapping against his stomache.

Chan was very well endowed, his length, thick, long, and heavy. The tip was a bright red, precum dripping, as his veiny length twitched from being untouched. Looking up at him through your lashes, you silently asking for permission. Chan stared back at you, his eyes dark with lust. Biting his lip, he nodded, “Make Daddy feel good princess.” You didn’t need to be told twice as you raised your hand, wrapping it firmly around his length, earning a hiss from Chan.

Leaning forward, looking up at him through your lashes, stuck out your tongue and slowly kitten licked his sensitive tip. When you blew on the wet tip, Chan grabbed your chin, “Stop teasing or else I’ll use you as my cum bucket and leave you unsatisfied.” When he released your jaw from his grip, you quickly engulfed his length, earning a groan from above. You took him out and licked the vein on the underside of his length. You then quickly flicked your tongue on his tip, then sucked on it lightly.

“Aaa-fuck!”, Chan groaned, pushing you down onto his length, making you gag loudly. His breathing became labored, “Just like that princess and I’ll cum.” You looked back up at him and made your jaw go slack, relaxing your throat, then swallowing around him. “Fuck!...Do that again.”, you looked up once again to see him falling apart. Chan’s mouth hung open, releasing moans. His chest was covered in a light sheen of sweat, and his head was thrown back in pleasure, hair sticking to his forehead. You could feel your pussy throbbing at the thought of him feeling so pleasured from using you.

You relaxed your throat, and swallowed around his length again. Chan’s hands immediately kept your head in place, as he released his load down your throat. “Swallow,” opening your mouth, you stuck out your tongue, proving your obedience, “Good girl.” Chan lifted you from your knees and tossed you onto the bed, onto your back. Chan slowly climbed in between your legs, and planted a kiss on your lips. The kiss contrasted greatly with the mood, as he caressed your body softly.

He brought his hands up to your breast, massaging the soft mounds. He squeezed your nipples between his finger tips, earning a soft gasp from you. Using it to his advantage, Chan slipped his tongue into your mouth, tongues fighting for dominance. He pulled away and began to plant bruises along your neck and jaw, “I missed you baby,” Chan lifted your legs, positioning himself at your entrance. “Did you miss me too princess?”

Without waiting for an answer, Chan slipped into you all at once, stretching you out deliciously, “Yes Daddy, I missed you! Fuck!” Chan quickly sped up his pace. The feeling of your, warm, tight pussy squeezing around him making something within him start to coil. You couldn’t take it, he was stretching you out way too good, and the pace he was at was making the friction unbearably good. Chan lifted your leg up into his shoulder and leaned in closer, hitting you deeper. You gripped his shoulders, nails leaving marks, causing him to his in pain and pleasure.

“Aah fuck. Daddy, I-I’m gonna c-cum.”, Chan automatically leaned back, putting your leg down. His hand trailed up your body, and took it’s place on your neck, squeezing lightly. You felt your stomache tighten as he slowed his pace, grinding into you deeply, but still hit you hard when thrusting inwards, making your breasts bounce. “You like that baby?”, your eyes teared up as you felt your high approaching, “How does it feel knowing that Daddy is the only one who can fuck you this good?”

You opened your mouth, a silent moan being released, as your legs began to shake violently. You came hard, walls squeezing Chan tightly causing him to hit his high too, a loud gutteral groan emitted from him. You thought you were done, but Chan quickly flipped you onto your stomache. He roughly pulled your hips up, causing your head to bury itself into your pillow.

Chan quickly pushed into you again, as you whined from overstimulation. Hands gripping your hips tightly, and probably going to leave bruises. He groaned as he quickly thrusted into you back and forth, watching as your pussy swallowed his length and pulled out again. “Fuck I’ve missed this tight pussy,” Chan raised a hand landing a smack on your ass, earning a high pitched whine from you. You bit on your pillow, but Chan smacked you ass again, “Don’t be quiet baby, let everyone hear how good I fuck you.”

The overwhelming sensation of Chan stretching you out from behind and his balls hitting your clit harshly from his thrusts, had you moaning uncontrollably. You felt the familiar feeling of that tightness in your stomache begin to build again. Just then Chan hit your g-spot in a particularly deep thrust, “Right there Daddy! I’m gonna cu-,” you were cut off when Chan began to drill into you. His pace making you squeeze uncontrollably around him.

Suddenly, the coil in your stomache snapped, and your thighs and shared bed were soaked. You were too delirious to notice that you had squirted, your thighs shook with postpartum pleasure as your cries rang throughout the room. At the sight Chan’s hips stilled, groaning, he filled you up with his hot semen. Slowly thrusting, Chan rode you both through your orgasms. He slipped out of you, and fell beside your body exhausted.

He turnd to face you, brown skin glowing from your recent orgasm. He thought you looked beautiful like that really, all fucked out just because of him. He smiled as he wrapped his arms around you, “I love you Y/N.” You smiled sleepily, “I love you too Chan.”

[brownjet-archive]

midnight dances + ticket stubs

pairing: peter parker x reader (poc and strongly hinted that is latina)

wc: 8000+

summary: an interrupted moment seems to be more nuclear than you or peter could have imagined. 

warnings: angst, some language, some heavy making out at the end but no smut, mentions of sex

a/n: so, it’s literally taken me a year to write this, i started this at the end of my last school year and a lot of shit happened since then so i finally got around to writing it, and holy shit it’s the longest one shot i’ve ever written

takes place after homecoming and is canon divergent !!

You were immensely regretting your decision to come to school on the last day. There was nothing to do, and hardly anyone in school. All the teachers seemed to have rolled their eyes, probably annoyed that 20 something students of the 2300 student body had shown up. Honestly, the only reason you had come was because Peter, Ned, and MJ said they would.

There was absolutely nothing to do. You had already emptied your locker, a few weeks ago because you were so done with school, and so had they, and you shifted from lounging in the library, running through the hallways and chilling in Mr. Harrington’s room.

You sitting in the library on one of the comfortable and plushy chairs, your legs draped over MJ’s lap, resting one elbow on the back of the bench, resting your face in the palm of your head, as the four of you lounged, contently listening to nostalgic music from the 2000′s, and suddenly you felt old.

The three of you laughed at the mortified look on Peter’s face, his face going red as a tomato, as the next song on his spotify played, as the familiar tune of the High School Musical number began. Despite laughing, you began singing along softly, ignoring the MJ’s snort.

“Not to be fake, but we’re soaring. flying. there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach.” You said, singing along with the track, laughing as you were singing.

Your energy was infectious, because by the end of the song, rather than just you singing softly under your breath, you had all joined in and were practically belting what was practically the anthem of your childhood. You had never really thought about it before, but it was pretty fucking awesome that the biggest couple growing up had been an interracial couple.

Before the song had ended, MJ had swiped Peter’s phone, now dubbing you in charge of the music, a smug smile on her face hoping that some embarrassing song played.

You rolled your eyes at her, quickly unlocking your phone, and putting on spotify, rolling your eyes as you clicked to watch the ad for the 30 minutes of uninterrupted listening, the four of you waiting in awkward silence for, the three of them waiting to make fun of your music tastes.

To your relief, your spotify seemed to be in a good mood, and decided to play, your body immediately relaxing at the soothing voice of Jason Mraz, Ned and you immediately beginning to sway to the music.

You hadn’t noticed the lovesick look on Peter’s face as he stared at you as you sang at the level that you thought was soft, your shoulders moving to the music, as it transitioned into what you had called the hispanic anthem Vivir Mi Vida.

You looked happier than you had been in months, a smile on your face, reaching your eyes. Sprawled across one of your best friends, looking truly happy. You were beautiful, really.

You slowly lowered the volume as the song died out, looking over at them, asking what the plan was, even though you guys had pretty much already decided that you would go to the corner store Mr. Delmar’s by your house, because it was the closet to Mr. Delmar’s, and you guys would buy sandwiches and ice-cream. However you would get candy and smartfood popcorn at the CVS by your school because it was cheaper, and there was a 90% chance that CVS would have them, as opposed to the 90% chance that Mr. Delmar would have run out by now.

You checked your phone, standing up, helping Ned up from the beanbag cushion he was sitting in, and all of you gathered your emptied out backpacks and even though there was still an hour and a half of school left, you decided to go say bye to Mr. Harrington for the summer, before leaving the building. You and MJ laughed at Ned who seemed to be elated with breaking the rules, though in relief you felt the same nervous and ecstatic butterflies in your stomach.

The four of you jogged across the street, waving a slight thanks at the drivers, despite the fact that a few honked at you, as you reached the CVS, walking in, immediately thankful for the air conditioning inside the building. The four of you walked towards the chips aisle with purpose, grabbing two of the big bags of the smartfood popcorn, before wandering towards the candy, grabbing a large pack of twizzlers, some sour gummy worms, a bag of skittles, a bag of the CVS brand soft caramels, a bag of marshmallows, and a packet of double stuff oreos, happy that you had nutella at home for the oreos and marshmallows, even though eating marshmallows with nutella was a pretty hard feat.

You each grabbed a can of Arizona, and headed up towards the cashier, before each of you pulled out some cash. You took your Arizona and put it in one of the cupholders of your bag, and you volunteered to carry a bag of popcorn, as did Peter.

You checked your phone, your eyes narrowed, ignoring MJ and Ned’s bickering about being able to open the twizzlers now, before you gripped at the closet limb of any of them, surprised when you accidentally groped Peter’s suprisingly strong bicep. You ignored it however, your eyes widening, as you again tugged on his bicep, yelling out, “The train is gonna be there in two minutes.”

The four of you sprinted towards the stop by the school, flipping off the drivers who honked at you, as you all rushed towards the stop, all of you but Peter, heavily panting as you ran up the stairs of the station, while at the same time fumbling to reach your wallet for your metro card, and as you reached the platform as the intercom said the train would be arriving, which typically meant about slightly less than a minute more, you squatted slightly, resting your hands on your thighs even if you did know that it was bad and constricting your lungs or whatever.

You stood up as the train pulled into the platform, grateful for the wind it provided, even if it was a rather dry one, and you were pretty sure that your body was drenched with sweat. The four of you stepped in, and because it was pretty much the middle of the day, the car was relatively empty and you all sat together, but far enough apart to rest your bags on the seats next to you, talking throughout the twenty minute train ride on which movie you guys should watch.

“No, we are not watching Star Wars again!”

“Star Trek?”

“Peter!”

“I know, I know. The Matrix.”

“MJ, no. Just no.”

“Disney?”

“Hell no.”

You all bickered for about fifteen minutes, before Ned suggested Galavant, and all of you nodded, agreeing that it would be fun to re-watch Galavant for a third time in 3 months. You all sluggishly stood up, exiting the air conditioned train, the stench of urine seeping through the air, and your face crinkled up in discomfort, even if you were used to the stenches of the city.

Peter guffawed at your expression, booping your nose, your eyes narrowing as you turned to glare at him, raising your fist rather jerkily, and his eyes widened in slight fear, before leaving it at that.

MJ hissed as you guys exited the station and walked into the sunlight, earning a weird look from you, although you had to admit that it was very bright.

“What are you, a fucking vampire?”

“Shut up.” She grumbled at you, looking as uncomfortable as you felt in the damp heat of the city. The four of you meandered towards the small establishment that Mr. Delmar owned, opening the door, the little bell ringing signaling that you had entered. The four of you offered slight smiles, you and Ned entrusting the other two to order the correct sandwiches as you walked towards the small cooler, looking at the limited, though not bad assortment of ice-cream, settling on a pint of cookies and cream and a pint of neopolitan. You petted both petted Murph, waiting for the sandwiches to be done before bringing the ice-cream to the front to avoid unnecessary melting.

Peter gave you guys a small nod, and you grabbed the ice-cream, bringing it up to the counter, offering Mr. Delmar a small smile, conversing with him in Spanish as he rung you up.

Thanking him, the four of you exited the small corner store and began the five minute trek to your apartment.

You sighed, a soft smile on your face as you checked the time, careful not to disturb MJ and Ned, who had fallen asleep. Sighing deeply at the fact that it was already one in the morning, the ice-cream and popcorn long gone. A few spare sour gummy worms remained still in the bag, sitting on your dresser, next to your comb. You sighed, of course Peter had bailed on you again.

Ignoring you frustration, you slowly got up, the weight of your bed shifting slightly, and you paused, your body hovering inches above the bed, letting go of a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding as they both continued to sleep soundly. You wandered over to your computer, the three of you having gotten bored of re-watching Galavant at the end of season one before deciding to watch the High School Musical films. They had fallen asleep somewhere between the first and second; you really didn’t care, continuing to watch anyways because the third was your favorite. A favorite song of yours was coming up, the one where Troy and Gabriella dance on the roof in the rain, but you knew that it cut off early before continuing on later, and instead you exited the tab, opening up spotify on the web browser, moving towards the window in your room, holding onto the computer with one arm waiting for the tab to load, while opening the window with one fluid motion, a cool summer night breeze wafting through your room.

You exited the window, sitting on the fire-escape, putting on your sappy romantic playlist reserved for nights like these. Nights were the city was peaceful, in spite of the loudness. Where the only noise was the whizzing of cars. 

The nights where the city seemed calm and quiet and peaceful.

Each song seemed to make you feel more calm, your eyes gently closed, not because of the not-so-picturesque alley your fire-escape faced, but rather to keep you grounded yet free. It was an odd sensation, but it was the only sensation of pure serenity you ever felt.

At some point, rather than swaying to the music while softly humming along,  your legs dangled off the platform. The cool metal grated section leaving angry marks on your thighs, despite the fact that they didn’t hurt, forcing you to stand up, resting your body on your arms against the railings. You inhaled deeply, the waft of the city seeping through your nose, which could often be described as unpleasant, but at this point you were used to it. The soft breeze ruffled your hair, goosebumps forming on the skin of your legs, your hands making their way to the pockets of your shorts, a moment of sleepy recognition as the one of your favorite songs from High School Musical, beginning to sing Gabriella’s part softly and passionately, too immersed in your own world to notice the presence that had joined you on the fire escape.

Peter felt bad. He really did. When he left, he could see the disappointment on your face and it hurt it to see you like that. He really hadn’t meant for it to take this long, but then again that’s what was expected of him as Spider-Man.

He swore loudly as he checked his phone, the battery dead and he had absolutely no inkling as to what time it was. It was definitely late, that he knew. Standing from the top of the building he was on, he shot his webshooter, only a meter or so of webbing escaping the mechanism, as it made an deflating noise. Great, just great. He was on the opposite side of the city, but he was determined to get back to your apartment and see you again.

Sighing, he asked KAREN where he should go, being advised to take the metro. He sighed, jumping down from the relatively small building, entering the relatively abandoned subway, before glancing at the clock seeing that it was half past midnight. He fished in his pocket for his metro card, waiting the four minutes for the train, before hopping on the train. Not really to his surprise, nobody really cared, the subway was practically deserted and the few other people on the train seemed to be going towards either Comic-Con or home from their long strenuous work shift.

He had been planning on climbing into your room through the fire escape outside of your window, while you were sleeping and fall into the heap of you, Ned, and M.J. and just say that he came back a few minutes after they had fallen asleep because May needed his help with something. But of course, it was just his dumb luck that you were sitting on the fire escape, with your legs hanging off, your hair blowing gently in the dry wind. Your mouth was slightly ajar, your eyes closed, and he felt his mouth go dry. Your hair seemed to catch the moonlight, creating a halo around you, and he swore that there was something ethereal about you.

Blinking out of his stupor as a car whizzed past, looking at you quickly, noticing that you hadn’t moved. Well, this made his job a little harder. He had to instead climb to the top of the building, and took off his mask, sticking it into his backpack, which he had left at the top of the building earlier, relieved that it hadn’t vanished. As some semblance of a though of his secret identity popped into his head, he looked around, before taking off his suit and changing rapidly, before entering the apartment building through the little door at the top, accidentally having used his strength to rip off the doorknob. He felt a little bad, but didn’t really worry, using the spare key that he knew was under the doormat to let himself into the apartment, expertly making it through the foyer to your room without making a single sound.

He opened the door to your room, stifling a giggle at the way Ned and M.J. had practically fallen off the beds, the sheets and pillows on the bed precariously keeping them from falling off. He gently tossed his bag aside, landing with the others, as he took a few gummy worms which were on your dresser, making a face as he bit into one, never prepared for how sour they were. Despite that, he continued eating them, moving over towards your window, smiling at you.

The music slowly shifted into something that he recognized, not sure how he recognized it, and he was drawn to the window and defying his better judgement he quietly stepped onto the fire escape, admiring you as you swayed to the music, and as soon as you began singing, he knew instantly that it was a song from High School Musical 3, the words coming to him instantly, and for some odd reason, he envisioned the dance moves in his head.

Without realizing, he began singing Troy’s part at the first entrance, and you whipped around, confused, staring at him. Your subconscious seemed to react quicker than your brain could process, as your hand rested on his shoulder, the other gripping his hand, with his other hand wrapped around your waist. The two of you continued to sing along to the song, even knowing the dance moves despite the small amount of space there was on the small landing.

It was as if you were in a trance, unaware of the world around you, both of you immersed completely in each other, the entire wold standing still. It was just the two of you in that moment, and you giggled brightly each time he lifted you up, and in response his face would light up, a small goofy grin stretching across his lips, his brown eyes full of admiration.

You felt completely safe as he dipped you, and slowly pulled you up, your face flush with his neck in a moment of intimacy, and from then on you danced closer, singing the words softly to one another, his breath fanning over your face.

The music slowly became less important, and rather you two were caught in this moment, his hands resting on your waist, your arms wrapped loosely around his neck, instinctively running through the soft hair at the nape of his neck, a slight shiver running through his body at the feeling of your hands in his hair.

It felt like his insides had turned to mush, and he wasn’t sure that he was actually standing, or rather that he was actually awake. He smiled at you, his warm brown eyes full of admiration, making your skin tingle slightly, as you licked your lips slightly, the both of you still swaying to the soothing voice of Elvis, before you both eventually stopped swaying altogether, staring into each other’s eyes, because for this moment it was only the two of you.

You hadn’t noticed that the song had tapered off without another one following, despite the fact that there were at least five more songs on the playlist, completely unaware of the fact that your laptop had just died, because the only thing you were aware of was Peter.

His soft hair, his soft eyes, his small crooked smile, his big ears, his small dimples, everything about him. You were completely aware of him, feeling so utterly and helplessly enamored with him.

He felt as if his heart was going to burst. Here you were, in his arms, so close to him that he was sure you could hear how loud his heart was beating. You looked so beautiful with your hair catching the moonlight and the way your eyes shined brightly, which slowly seemed to be closing as your face got closer to his.

His eyes started to droop slowly as his face moved closer to yours. You licked your lips out of habit, the spell of calm and excited intimacy still palpable in the air, as your faces seemed to get closer together, his breath fanning over your face, feeling the ghost of his lips on your own.

And like that the spell was broken.

A loud snore emitted from someone from inside the room, startling both you and Peter, and you nearly jumped out of your skin, the both of you suddenly aware of your position.

His hands immediately left your waist, as if somehow your touch had burned him, an uncomfortable sensation of pain filling your chest. Your face immediately fell, and he instantly regretted his movement, glad when your turned away from him, as he rubbed his face in frustration, feeling the urge to scream.

You let out a shaky exhale before entering your room, not looking back at Peter, who had climbed in after you, closing the window behind him, lying down between MJ and Ned, while you tried to keep yourself as far away from him as possible, the both of you lying silently in the darkness for the rest of the night.

You had been avoiding Peter for days. That technically wasn’t so long, especially with school ending so there was no reason to see him everyday, but prior to the incident you had made plans as a group to hang out. That technically wasn’t so long, but as day five of not even texting Peter, you felt an ache, a pain in your chest at not being able to see him.

You hadn’t even texted the group chat, only sending an individual text to MJ saying that you had come down with a bug that your brother had given to you. It was true, to an extent, but it hadn’t taken you out of commission for five days; it had barely done so for five hours. But, it was enough for MJ to pass the message along, and you hadn’t been bothered for the remainder of the week, as you tried to do anything that would stop your brain from overanalysing the would-be kiss you had with Peter. 

Besides, there was no way that it could’ve possibly happened, because why on earth would Peter kiss you? Why would he ever like you back? And, if it almost happened, what caused his momentary lapse in judgement?

Whatever. Shut up.

There was no point to speak to yourself in that way, because you desperately knew that that wasn’t true. It wasn’t that you couldn’t believe Peter wouldn’t want to kiss you, because frankly you were awesome and if it was a momentary lapse in judgement then it was proof that Peter Parker was a fake-ass bitch who didn’t deserve your friendship.

Even pretending to be mad at him was exhausting. It left you feeling hollow, no matter how much you willed yourself to believe that it wasn’t just you who had wanted that kiss, because of the stupid voice in your head saying that if he had wanted to kiss you as much as you wanted to kiss him, that it would have happened, interruption or not. 

You felt a wave of nausea wash over you, tears prickling at your eyes as a chocked sob escaped your throat, feeling the descent into despair all over again. You desperately wanted to screech out, your hands cover your face in frustration; annoyed with how you couldn’t even talk to MJ about this because she wouldn’t be understanding of it, and you didn’t want to force her to take sides, annoyed with how affected you were by this, and by how much your stupid brain was causing you to feel so shitty. 

You closed your eyes, burning still from the amount of tears that you had shed during the week, and carefully breathed in through your nose, before letting out a slow and shaky exhale through your mouth, feeling your heart rate lowering, resulting in feeling more grounded. You laid there for a few more minutes, taking slow breaths, your breathing becoming less shaky, and the wet trails on your cheeks beginning to dry, leaving the skin on your face feeling tight and cooler than you had felt before. You took a deep breath, before sitting up.

You caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and grimaced. Your hair was disheveled, your skin looking ashen, and dark circles under your eyes very pronounced, with slightly puffy eyes. Thankfully, you truly did look sick, so your parents wouldn’t call you out on your bullshit. You looked away, and sighed in frustration, before opening the window slightly to let the room air out, and then left your room to go to the kitchen in search of food. 

Peter felt like shit. He hadn’t seen you in nearly a week and felt so fucking horrible. He knew you, and your penchant for overthinking things, and the image of your fallen face when the moment had been broke; the look on your face falling being immediately replaced by one of surprise, disappointment, and worst of all, expectance, made him feel like shit. 

He had been pacing the ceiling of his room explaining to a confused and a not-quite understanding Ned, who was watching him pace back and forth for the past forty minutes. It wasn’t that Ned wasn’t understanding, because he was, he just wasn’t understanding the situation.

“Wait, so what?” Ned asked again, maybe for the third time, the question beginning to grate on Peter’s nerves. “You were dancing on the fire-escape, almost kissed, you guys didn’t because MJ or I snored? That’s ridiculous Peter, you know I don’t snore.” He continued.

“Are you really that caught up in the semantics of it? Besides, dude, you snore so loudly.” Peter argued, rolling his eyes slightly.

“No I don’t, because I use...”

“Vicks, yeah.” Peter cut him off, slightly annoyed. “What is it about vicks that you, MJ, and (y/n) swear by?”

“It’s a person of color thing.” Ned replied nonchalantly, not focusing on Peter’s crisis anymore, continuing to work on the hogwarts lego set that had been abandoned since Peter had started having his rant. “I really don’t get it, didn’t you want to kiss (y/n)?”

“More than anything.” Peter whined out, his heart aching, wishing that he hadn’t chickened out, and had just kissed you.

“Then, ask her out!” Ned loved you and Peter to death, but it was becoming increasingly annoying how much you both tiptowed around your feelings for one another.

“It’s not that simple.” Peter tried to argue.

“Sure it is, gimme your phone.” 

“What, why? What are you going to do?” Peter asked, reluctantly tossing his phone over to Ned.

“Just relax, I’m not gonna send it.” Ned said, waving off Peter’s worry, Peter settling over the rail of his bunk, looking down and over Ned’s shoulder at his opened instagram. 

“You follow the Spider-Man official page?” Ned asked, looking over at Peter with a look of confusion.

Peter felt his ears heat up, a blush dusting over his cheeks. “Yeah...”He mumbled, trailing off. “They do a really good job though!” He said indignantly, feeling the need to defend himself.

“Don’t you run it?” Ned asked, a look of amused confusion spreading across his face, remembering something similar that Peter had mentioned.

“Um, no, my aunt does. I run the Thor official page.” He admitted quietly, causing Ned to snort before laughing completely.

“May runs the Spider-Man page?” Ned asked through laughs, trying to get clarification. “That’s adorable, she supports you, man.” He tried to be serious, he really did, but he couldn’t keep himself from grinning.

“Shut up, didn’t you have a point to steal my phone?” Peter pouted, before immediately regretting it, seeing Ned’s eyes flash open in remembrance.

“Oh yeah, we’s gonna get you a date.” Ned said happily, moving his finger over to your name, before cringing. “I don’t know why I said it like that.”

“Dude I don’t even know why you say half of the things you say, because you say lots of stuff like that.”

“What? No, I don’t.”

“Yes you do.”

“Should I change the way I speak?” Ned asked, looking over at Peter as if his whole life was a lie.

“No dude, it’s fine. I was joking, I love the way you speak.” Peter reassured his best friend, feeling bad that he had led Ned to believe that he spoke in a weird way.

“It’s fine Peter, I was just playing.” He chuckled good-naturedly, a warm smile on his face.

His eyes widened again, the whole conversation having been derailed yet again. Peter groaned internally as Ned remembered, hoping that he would’ve derailed the conversation enough for Ned to not remember.

“Relax dude, I’m not gonna send it.” He said to a squirming Peter, as he typed out the text. Peter felt slightly relieved, letting out a gentle sigh, and closing his eyes briefly, waiting for Ned to finish.

“Okay so, here’s what I wrote, and don’t worry I haven’t sent it.” Ned reassured Peter, who’s eyes opened and focused on the phone screen in front of them both, letting Ned read it aloud, not comfortable to read the whole thing upside down and not wanting to sit down.

“You wanna go see Yesterday tomorrow at 6:15?” Ned read aloud.

Peter had been expecting more, and looked at him with a face of confusion. “That’s it?”

“That’s it, I mean that way it’s not really a date. It’s just you guys hanging out, so that there’s no outright way that you’re being rejected.” Ned explained. “Dude, you’re overthinking it.” He sighed, trying to reassure Peter, the anxious look on his face giving all of his emotions away. 

“It’s a really good think Spider-Man has a mask that covers his whole face, because dude you can’t emote secretly.”

“Dude.” 

Ned rolled his eyes at the look of mock offense written on Peter’s face. “So, when are you gonna send it?” 

“Um, never.”

“No, you are. You’ve got nothing to lose. Seriously dude, on the list of high stake things that you face, this is such a low stake.” Ned said, trying to cajole and relax Peter.

“Except if she says no, that means she hates me.”

“That’s a reach. If she says no it’s probably because she’s still sick. MJ hasn’t let you know anything differently, right?” 

“I don’t know, she hasn’t been in the group chat for days. The last text I got from her was a pigeon on the subway in despair.”

“Makes sense.” Ned said, nodding his head as the image popped into his mind. “Well, anyways dude, just send it. Are we still gonna make mac and cheese?” 

“Yeah, Aunt May should be home soon with the stuff for it.” As soon as he said that, the clanging of the keys in the door sounded, and the door to the apartment could be heard opening. 

“Boys, please come help put the groceries away!” May called out from the kitchen.

“Sure thing!” Ned called out.

“Need a minute.” Peter called out at the same time. He stood on solid ground for the first time in an hour, blood rushing to his head leaving him feeling slightly lightheaded. Now alone in his room, he glanced over at his phone, closed his eyes and took a deep breath before hitting send.

He then slipped his phone into his pocket and left to go help his Aunt and his best friend put away the groceries.

You were slightly startled as your phone buzzed, surprised that it wasn’t on silent. You continued chewing your spoonful of cereal, glancing over at the screen seeing the stupid icon of the group chat: peter with the big lips snapchat filter yelling at a fire hydrant. Having felt more stable after watching three episodes of Stranger Things, you reached over for the remote and paused.

You opened up your phone and clicked on the notification, taking you to the group chat. You skimmed the text from him, before sending back a simple “sure, i’m down” before unpausing the episode.

Peter nearly dropped the jar of squeezable jelly an inside joke with his aunt feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket. He wish he could’ve said that he didn’t rush for his phone to check if you had texted him back, but that would have been a lie. He opened his phone in record time, reading your text quickly. He kept on rereading it, looking at his phone for nearly a minute, before May threw a kitchen towel at him, hitting him in the face. 

“I asked you to help, not look at your phone.” She teased.

It was then that Peter seemed to register your text, his eyes widening before frantically yelling at Ned, “What the hell does ‘sure i’m down’ mean?”

His nervous energy seemed infectious, and his shouting caused Ned to butterfingers the small bag of plums that May had gotten, turning to Peter with a look of annoyed confusion on his face. “Did you have to yell that at me? And, it means yes.” 

“Hm, depends on the tone.” May interjected, causing a new wave of panic to wash over Peter.

“Well, what does it mean then?” He whined.

“What’s the context?”

“I asked (y/n) if she wants to see Yesterday with me tomorrow at the "15 showing.”

“And the response was ‘sure, i’m down’?” May asked to clarify. “Well, Peter then that means, ‘sure, i would like to watch that movie’. It’s not as complicated as you’re making it out to be.”

“Yeah dude, try to calm down a little. It’s (y/n), and it’s a movie that they have literally not shut up about. All the talk about ‘supporting brown people in western media,’ so it’s really a no brainer.” 

“Okay, okay.” Peter nodded, the words resonating with him, and for the first time in over an hour he felt calm again.

That all immediately disappeared when May jokingly asked what he was going to wear on his date.

You were waiting at the theater, having already gone to the cvs to buy snacks to sneak in, and were currently waiting on the group to join you. You glanced down at your phone, and continued playing Tetris, looking up every so often to see if you could see them. You became anxious as it became 11:36, and still saw no sight of them. Normally MJ and Ned would’ve been here by now, with Peter being this late. 

“Hey, you ready?” A familiar voice panted out, and you looked up from your phone to see Peter slightly out of breath, bending over and resting his hands on his knees. 

“You know you’re supposed to put your hands up? You’re constricting your chest.” You said out of habit, a little embarrassed that you had said that, but feeling relatively okay at being around Peter for the first time in a week since the incident. “Yeah, but where’s MJ, and Ned. They didn’t bail on us, did they?” You asked, confusion seeping into your features.

Peter’s eyes widened in surprise, confusion settling across his face briefly, before his expression changed into a panicked awkward. “Um, no they both had to bail.” He lied, lamely.

You regarded him with suspicion, your anxiety beginning to rise at the idea of sitting through a whole movie next to Peter, without the safety blanket of your other friends. You had no idea why he would lie to you, but couldn’t even focus on it. You just rolled your eyes, and shook your head, as if to shake all these thoughts from them. “Whatever. You got your ticket?” You asked.

“Yep.” He replied, showing it as proof. 

“Cool, let’s go.” You said, the two of you walking over to the usher, not bothering with rushing since it was relatively new, so there would be a good twenty minutes of preview. 

The usher handed you back your ticket stubs, and you both hopped onto the escalator, going up towards the rest of the theaters. 

“You got the drinks?” You asked, it customary of Peter being the one to bring the drinks.

“Yep, you got the popcorn?” He asked.

You nodded briefly. “Also got chocolate.”

“Like, Hershey’s?”

“No, like the bougie Ghiradelli’s shit.”

The whole conversation felt very mechanical, and an awkward air surrounded the two of you, feeling unsure of what to say. So, you continued silently up the elevator, passing the concession stands.

“Hey, can you bring my bag to the theater? I need to use the bathroom real quick.” You asked, handing the bag to Peter who was nodding.

You rushed into the bathroom, took a piss, and washed your hands. After drying your hands, you felt the urge to screech and pull out your hair, not sure if you could truly sit through the movie, which sucked since you had really wanted to see it. You quickly opened instagram as you walked towards the theater, moving to check your messages. Only then did you realize that the message had been from Peter, individually. You had completely forgotten that the icon of the group chat was Peter’s own icon, and you had used it for the group chat because of how ridiculous it was.

You quickly found Peter in the theater, and moved towards the center middle seats that he had found for you, before standing up letting you briefly know that he had to go to the bathroom. 

Great, ten minutes into hanging out with him and you guys had said maybe five things to each other, and the awkwardness had seeped in. 

You were thankful when the theater darkened, Peter having slipped into his seat a few minutes ago. You quickly closed all the apps on your phone and lowered the brightness to the lowest setting, before focusing your attention back on the screen.

Once the movie ended, you turned to Peter, a big enthusiastic smile on your face. “Oh my god, I loved it! He was so adorable.” You gushed to Peter, a smile spreading across his face. 

“Yeah, it was pretty awesome. But dude, Lily James out here being amazing as always.”

“Oh right, I forgot about your huge-ass crush on Lily James.” You teased.

“Oh, come on, you don’t think that she’s amazing?”

You rolled your eyes at him, laughing slightly. “I do think she’s amazing, but she wasn’t the focus. It was about this dorky Indian dude, and I’m so down for more brown people in western media.” You gushed, the two of you moving out of the theater. 

Peter chuckled softly at seeing you so happy, talking animatedly about the movie. “Can you hold my stuff?” You asked again, and he grabbed it for you as you entered the bathroom, and quickly came back out again.

You saw Peter on his phone, a small smile on his face, before you cleared your throat, announcing your presence in a rather stuck up way. “Hey, mind holding my stuff as I run to the bathroom?” He asked.

You nodded, grabbing his stuff from him. “No problemo.” You said in the most american accent you could, before opening up your phone for the first time since the movie had started, before quickly remembering what had happened earlier. A quick look of confusion flashed over your face as you crafted a text to MJ.

“Hey, so what do you wanna do now?” Peter asked, his presence drawing you away from your phone, forgetting that you needed to press send. 

“I don’t know, I’m good with getting food, or do you wanna movie hop?” You asked, not really in the mood to be walking around the city just yet. 

“I’m good with movie hopping.” Peter answered quickly. 

“Cool, I know that they’re reshowing Cruel Intentions.”

“Didn’t they do that in March for the 25th anniversary or something?” Peter questioned.

“Yeah, but it was doing the really well so they’re bringing it back for the next few weeks, since there is kind of a dryspell of new movies coming out till early August. And it was the 20th anniversary.” You corrected. 

“You sure seem to know an awful lot about this sex movie from the late nineties.” Peter teased, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

You rolled your eyes and laughed at him, gently flicking his shoulder. “If you’re insinuating what I think you’re insinuating Parker, then you would be wrong. I have not seen it, but I wanna.”

“If you haven’t seen it, then how do you know so much about it, and why would you wanna watch it?” He asked, as you guys made your way to the theater diagonally three down from the previous theater you were in.

“Sarah Michelle Gellar.” Was your simple answer.

“Ah, your thirst for Buffy is once again the undoing of us.” Peter teased.

“Hey, my thirst for Buffy has nothing to do with the undoing of us as a group!” You cried out indignantly, despite the smile on your face. “My love for Buffy has brought us closer if anything, we’ve watched the entire series.” You said, as the two of you sat in the back of the theater, not wanting to take seats right in the middle and displace people who had paid for it.

“Twice.” 

“Yes, because it’s a wonderful and amazing show. Besides, if anything is the undoing of us as a group then it would have to be you ditching us all the time.” You teased, the words immediately leaving a bitter taste in your mouth, wishing that you hadn’t said that. 

The light and cheery, and normal air between the two of you had taken nearly two hours to cultivate, and had only came about by watching a movie. And you had managed to destroy it in a matter of a single sentence. 

Peter’s face immediately fell, a look of shame and anger flashing across his face. “I’m not ditching you guys, I’m just super busy...”

“Right, Stark Internship and all.” You nodded, cutting him off in hopes of avoiding this conversation.

“Yeah, and I have a shit-ton of other responsibilities, like stupid fucking decathlon team, robotics team, and all the fucking homework we get.”

You inhaled sharply, feeling ridiculous that tears were prickling at the corners of your eyes. Decathlon team was how you and Peter became good friends. With a cold and calculated voice you said, “I don’t know why you’re yelling at me about this. It’s not like I can control what you have on your plate.” You took a deep breath before looking at him, your expression softening, replaced with worry. “I know you’re going through a lot, especially with Uncle Ben, but Peter, we can’t do anything, I can’t do anything to help you if you keep pushing me away.”

His face crumbled, and he reached for your hand, feeling a little hurt when you flinched slightly before he could do so. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’m so fucking sorry, I’ve got a lot going on, and that’s not your fault and it’s not fair of me to take it out on you.” He apologized. 

You nodded in understanding, before moving your hand to gently rest on top of his, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles. “I forgive you, Peter.”

“I hope you know that I’m not ditching you.” He said softly, and you rolled your eyes with an incredulous look. “Well, not intentionally.” He corrected himself, and you smiled at him.

“I know.”

“May needs me a lot more, and I feel like I need to be with her more.”

You sighed, a small, sad smile appearing on your face. “That makes sense, Peter, but know that I’m here if you ever need anybody to talk to. And, you shouldn’t feel so guilty about not spending time with her.”

“I know, I just, don’t want to leave her alone and have what happened to Uncle Ben happen to her.” He said, his voice beginning to crack, as tears began prickling in the corners of his eyes.

“Peter, what happened to Ben wasn’t your fault.” You softly whispered to him, moving your hand from resting on top of his, to brushing away the single tear that had fallen from his eyes. 

Oh, how wrong you were. And with that, the lights shut off and the movie began. 

You inhaled sharply as Sarah Michelle Gellar kissed the boy onscreen, squirming in your seat, suddenly becoming uncomfortable at watching this with Peter in a theater with maybe only twelve other people. You had to look away, movie kisses always seemed to gross you out because it seemed like an invasion of privacy. 

You glanced over at Peter who had also looked away, his face turning towards you, the both of your eyes widening as you communicated almost telepathically. 

“What the fuck is happening?” You whispered, giggling nervously.

“I think Buffy is seducing her step-brother to get his car.” He whispered back.

“I mean, I know that, but that is not Buffy.” 

“So says you.”

You paused for a moment, before moving your face closer to his, “Should we leave? If this is too much for wittle petew we can leave.” You teased, immediately regretting it, knowing that he would take it as a challenge to stay, despite the fact that you wanted to leave.

“No, I’m good, that is unless, you want to leave.” He whispered back, and you immediately shook your head. 

“No, I can watch it.”

“Good.”

“Good.” You mocked, before turning back to the screen, the kiss having turned into what was a sex scene. You immediately looked away, your face whipping back towards Peter with widened eyes, and he immediately turned back towards you.   

Your faces were closer than they were the time before, and you inhaled shakily, your eyes flitting from his eyes to his lips then back to his eyes, before swallowing slightly.

Immediately his lips were on yours, his hand coming up to cradle your face, your hands moving their way through his hair as you kissed him back as enthusiastically. You inhaled deeply, causing your nerves to feel like you were on fire, everything about the kiss, the way his hand gently yet firmly held your jaw, the way your lips moved against each other, the way his curls felt in your fingers, your fingernails gently scratching his scalp, the way his tongue languidly slid into your moth, the way it tasted like smartfood white cheddar cheese.

Wait, what?

You pulled away from each other, a perplexed expression on your face as you regarded him with a sense of enamored confusion.

“You taste kind of like the popcorn.” He whispered, as if you didn’t already know.

“Yeah, you do too. Kinda unpleasant.” You admitted softly, an offended look flashing across his face. “Oh!” Your face lit up in slight realization. “I have chocolate.”

You quickly turned away from him, reaching into your backpack for the chocolate squares of milk chocolate with caramel and sea salt that you had purchased, handing one to Peter.

He looked confused, but humored you, and opened the square biting into nearly half of it. He took another bite, much smaller than the last one, and before he could react, you had take then other piece from him, slipping it into your mouth, your lips on each others with not fully melted pieces of chocolate.

You couldn’t help but moan softly into the kiss, the taste of the chocolate being so much better than the popcorn taste. It was thicker, and richer, and the way your mouths moved against each other, the chocolate continue to melting in your mouths, coating your tongue, as you slipped it into Peter’s mouth. You lazily made out with him for a little bit, reveling in the delightful chocolate kiss, before Peter’s hand moved to your waist, gently pulling you even closer towards him.

You smiled into the kiss, trying to pull away so that you could put the armrest up, but he kissed you insistently, bringing both arms to rest on your waist, picking you up and pulling you over the armrest, placing you on his lap, his lips never leaving yours.

You situated on his lap, straddling him, feeling something move against your thigh, causing you to pull away from him, looking down, then back at him with an amused smirk on your face.

“It was the stupid movie.” He whimpered, feeling mortified that you had felt it.

“Don’t worry, I figured.” You reassured him, smiling at him, a goofy and euphoric smile appearing on his face as he looked at you. “You should know though, that I don’t have sex till the first date.” You joked, before pressing a quick kiss on his lips.

He had a delayed reaction, his eyes opening and lips unpursing a second after you had finished kissing him. “I was joking, I haven’t had sex yet, and I would expect a date before sex.” You told him, and even though you were serious, the light tone in which you had said it, made it fit.

“You don’t call this a date?” He teased, smiling at you, pulling you in for another kiss.

You kissed him deeply, your mouths parting as your lips moved against one another, the taste of chocolate still overpowering the kiss, and making your brain hazy, as you tried to pull away from him to answer.

“No, I call it a misunderstanding.” 

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I thought you were asking in the group chat,” You admitted, before kissing him briefly, too long for a peck, but too short for the kisses that you had been having. “So, Parker, when you gonna grow the balls to ask me out?” You teased, kissing him again.

He pulled away from you, a goofy grin appearing on your face, which must have been similar to his own, his pupils blow out, his hair disheveled, his lips swollen and slightly shiny, making you guess about your current state. He stared at you briefly, before tickling your ribcage gently, a quieted laughter escaping you, before his lips were briefly on yours again.

“So, (y/n),” He began, placing a quick peck on your lips, “would,” peck, “you”, peck, “go”, peck, “out”, peck, “on”, peck, “a” peck, “date”, peck, “with”, peck, “me?” Suddenly, his lips were on yours again, firm and gentle, seeming to wipe away any semblance of a response.

He pulled away softly, your eyes remaining closed, before briefly fluttering open, the question that he asked you suddenly popping back into your mind. “Yes!” You whispered. “Yes, Peter I would love to go on a date with you.” 

“Great.” He said, grinning up at you wildly, before languidly kissing you again. 

You couldn’t wipe the goofy, lovesick, smile off of your face for the rest of the night, even after your little brother had made a comment about how you looked crazy. It hadn’t even registered in your brain, as you grabbed a glass of water before heading towards your room, smiling at the photo-booth photos you had of you and each individual member of your group. 

If possible your smile grew bigger at seeing Peter’s, your lips still tingling, the taste of chocolate lingering on your tongue. Without thinking, you slowly brought your hand up to your mouth, gently touching your lips, ghosting over where Peter’s had been an hour ago. You pulled the ticket stub out of your phone case, where you had stuffed it, before placing it with the photos you had of Peter. 

Your phone buzzed, and you giggled slightly, not hesitating to open the text from Peter. 

thai tommorow?

yeah, that’d be awesome.

i fucking love thai

lmao i know, that’s why i asked

you’re kind of a perfect nerd, parker

thanks, i guess

you’re kind of a beautiful nerd

thanks perfect parker

[josephohduh]

TEW2: a semi-rant because it’s been a few days and I forget things

I went into TEW2 completely blind, aside from knowing that Stefano and Obscura were of some importance in the game because of the trailers.

And I know that some people were rather disappointed with the outcome, whereas a lot of major gaming news outlets that I follow stated that TEW2 was extremely good and the way horror games sequels should be.

So, naturally, I wanted to remain open.

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT, DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU PLAN ON PLAYING/WATCHING TEW2 YOURSELF

I'm a bit disappointed that the entire voice cast was different. The very second Sebastian started speaking I knew one of two things: that it had been a long time since I played the first game, or that wasn't the same Sebastian I'm used to hearing. So when I looked into it I realized not only was Seb's VA different, everyone else from the previous game had different VAs as well. I don't know if this had anything to do with the VA strike that happened some time ago that affected a lot of VAs (such as Chloe from Life is Strange)

That aside, I wanted to know if TEW2 was going to fill in the gaps and answer questions I had that rose from the previous game.

But first, some highlights from my playthrough with my partner:

- belting the Kingdom Hearts theme during the opening - “man I can’t wait to have to choose between a sword, wand, and shield. and gun” - “holy shit I’m going to be SO COMFORTABLE cosplaying Sebastian again” - hewwo? HEWWO??? - "MYRA IS THE MILK MONSTER?" - "You know, for every god damn time I was asked ‘but is it art?’, I’d probably become a serial killer too” - at Obscura’s appearance: “I DON’T LIKE IT” - “how the fuck does it walk, it’s a fucking tripod” “yes” - at Stefano’s first appearance: “okay but can I just fucking snipe Stefano from here” *does it anyway* “yeah that would’ve been too easy” - “YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU CAN HAVE THE CHILD” - *low pitched baby crying* - “You’re a solid dude” - Sebastian’s not here right now, please leave a message

The first chapter was fantastic. We know that the start of Seb’s trauma was the fire that took away his house and daughter and eventually caused a rift in his marriage, and that Beacon was sorting the tipping point to his mental health. It was also a good way of getting into the controls of the game again. When Seb was approached by Kidman at the bar, hoo boy was he an absolute mess.

Once again, this is probably because it’s been so long since I played TEW1 and its DLCs, but I originally thought the face of the Administrator was a mystery? You could imagine my surprise when I saw his face and was like whoa he’s got a nice looking face that’s weird.

Also I was convinced one of his bodyguards was Joseph, or at least a Joseph look-alike. But I guess they wouldn’t have put him out in the open that easily.

So, I didn’t really mind the whole open world concept much. Honestly, I kinda liked it? The shift into a more action-y horror though? Been there, done that with the ResEvil series :/

However, with the game being open world there was A LOT of stuff I ended up missing. I apparently missed a couple of photographic slides which, I ended up having to look this up, were the key the unlocking the Joseph slide. I ALSO missed the chance to run into TEW1 Seb’s body?? I know there’s a scene where you encounter TEW1 Seb as a reflection in a mirror, but I didn’t know you can also find him as a straight up physical body that you could destroy. 

ANIMA WAS WHAT MAKES SURVIVIAL HORROR A SURVIVAL HORROR. Who was she? What did she want with me? Why wouldn’t she leave me alone??? I especially loved the scene where you had to go through a certain series of doors to avoid her. WHY DID IT STOP AFTER JUST TWO DOORS, LET ME BE CHASED BY THIS GHOSTLY LADY. 

I get that she was supposed to be some manifestation of Seb’s (and Union civilian NPCs’) guilt and fears, but if he was supposed to have to fight it LET 👏 ME 👏 FIGHT 👏 IT 👏

Speaking of antagonists with potential: what HAPPENED WITH STEFANO?

He had such good potential, an excellent backstory, and was given the most anti-climactic boss fight ever made. 

Same with Father Theodore. There was this whole huge buildup and then when it came to the boss fight, it was...disappointing. And it all seemed too easy? Maybe I didn’t have my difficulty high enough? I did die plenty of times but that’s cause I generally can’t go through a game without dying at least ten times within one chapter. And that’s usually cause at some point I get bored of waiting and try to gun through it.

And then Myra was just...weird. Like, in the end she was an Actual Boss Battle. But just everything after that went too fast in such little time. 

“We can be a family again!” “No I have to finish The Plan!!!”

*cue the TLOU scenes where you have to run with a child in your arms*

And can we talk about the side characters for a moment. 

Liam “I’m never leaving my safe house but does anyway” O’Neal. I honestly thought he would have lived through the whole thing. I mean, he flat out refused to leave his safe house. But boy howdy did Father Theodore whisper some sweet things into his ear and convinced him otherwise. And if you think I’m gonna willingly fight more Harbingers for parts to fix his flamethrower boy do I have news for you. I said screw that noise. 

Yukiko “walking textbook” Hoffman. I hated her at first. I really did. All her dialogue was very textbook and “you can tell I’m really smart cause I’m the team psychologist” and also “we need an asian character but not Joseph so”. I’m pretty sure at some point I stopped listening to her. I’M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED IN HER DEATH. I saw it coming the moment the scene started but she COULD HAVE potentially be saved. STRETCH OUT YOUR ARMS MORE, SEB.

Esmeralda “please for the love of god don’t be a love interest” Torres. YOU INTRODUCE US A BADASS CHARACTER. AND THEN YOU KILL HER AT THE END OF THE SAME CHAPTER SHE APPEARS IN??

Partner: “she was just put in to be fuel for Man Pain” BLEUGH

But then you find out, she was the operative that took Lily during the fire. And then that was that?? THAT’S IT. THAT WAS HER ONLY CONNECTION TO THIS WHOLE SITUATION. She was ‘someone who had a lot of regrets and wanted to redeem herself in some way’. And also ‘yeah she was the one you was tasked to take your daughter’. 

???? JOHANAS. EXPLAIN. 

Partner: “did they like.. switch writers in the middle of all this. cause that’s what this seems like”

Julian “you’re a solid dude” Sykes. DID HE MAKE IT?? I know it was supposed to be a 25% chance through STEM and that he said he was going to remove his brain chip immediately when he got out but. DID. HE. MAKE. IT. 

Partner: “you can tell it was an american director cause all the poc were killed off” Me, a poc: “OMG”

And let’s not forget everyone’s biggest concern: WHERE IS JOSEPH. 

I knew that Joseph had a photographic slide. But what I didn’t know was that you had to collect all the previous slides in order to unlock that slide. GUESS WHO’S MISSING SLIDES AND DIDN’T GET IT. 

So I ended up having to look it up and just 

“It’s a long story”

Oh okay *finishes the game and has it never brought up again*

UH????

So essentially, regardless of whether or not you get all the photographic slides, Joseph was completely written out of the game. 

And like everyone else, I’m annoyed. You establish that he was never killed and that’s he’s alive and kicking somewhere. But WHERE IS HE, JOHANAS. 

I feel like some time after Stefano the game was just. Rushed. 

But that ending. Is it implying that we’re gonna be getting another sequel?? Or at least a DLC?? Please let it be a DLC I don’t want this game to get dragged like the ResEvil series (don’t get me wrong, I love the ResEvil series, but there were some good games and there were some bad games)

I do intend on replaying TEW2 because there was clearly a lot that I missed in my first run-through. 

And like, while I didn’t hate TEW2 I do believe some parts could have been executed better. 

This is probably gonna be one of those things where I replay it a few times or sit on it for a while or look up more info and just have an “OH that makes more sense” moment.

Was it worth the wait? I suppose? There’s still things where I’m like “??” and now I have even more “??” but I tend to be a bit slow with realizing things. 

Would I tell people to absolutely go and get it? That part’s up to you. If you want to play it yourself, then definitely go ahead. But if you feel like you can’t justify the ~$60 for something you might end up being disappointed in, then definitely check up on some playthroughs/let’s plays. 

I’m still gonna purchase merch (despite all the good stuff only being available in the european store >:( I’ll figure something out)

And I’m still gonna make art and cosplay from the game. 

And if it wasn’t for TEW to begin with, I wouldn’t have met some pretty cool people

[qanoor]

why did I do that why did I do that why did I do that

because I always love to make myself more miserable than I already am (!!!) yet again I went to heer’s blog (you know I really need to not call her heer here or anywhere else anymore, just jahnavi, because she is not my heer anymore she is not not not) & I saw that she started a SoundCloud for slam poetry and of course I managed to find it but because life is just horrible it started to play before I meant it to and I had to listen to her voice (she sounds like slam is growing on her, and I hate it, I hate this idea that she could become some slam poet, and I am so annoyed by her) and then the SoundCloud app on my phone tried to make me sign in but I didn’t want to and it wouldn’t let me stop her poem her voice and then it went to the next track and finally I stopped it somehow but like …. wow iPhone I love the anxiety attacks you give me so fucking much! & then as if that wasn’t enough masochism I went to her SoundCloud on my laptop but this time I did not listen & I guess that’s good at least but like…

I think it’s so ironic that she writes about things like how non-black POC shouldn’t use AAVE but does she know about how non-black POC have appropriated slam poetry (not that we, and even white people, shouldn’t do slam poetry, but that it’s complicated) and also like whatever she’s just another desi queer who doesn’t know enough about her own background from the Indian elite so she’ll focus on elite postcolonialism and Tumblr SJ instead so what-ever if you & I were still together maybe you’d actually learn some things about how complicated Indian complicity is but also maybe not because you are still a liberal pretending to be a leftist and anyway we couldn’t be together, no that’s been and gone

and I’m kind of acting like a really bitter ex? and I am a really bitter ex, and I know I wouldn’t know enough about how complicated postcolonialism and complicity is either if it weren’t for my parents, especially my father, and my privilege of an activist background (in a sense) and…. I have bought so much into shit too, I have been so much a part of Discourse too believed in it propagated it and.... yeah,

and I know, I know, I know that I should not begrudge her so, I know I should be happy for her that she is applying to mfa programs too and that she’s putting her poetry out there and I should not be so fucking competitive and cruel about it all but I. just can’t seem to stop being so fucking angry and yet I do this to myself, I go to her blog and I think about how much she annoys me, how much her friends annoy me, how much her other ex annoys me, whatever whatever whatever I am never ever getting over her

/ this is messy and wrong and I am sorry